December 16, 2017, the last day I colored my hair.
The hair color was classic and simple, medium brown with just a few highlights. Not too much, nor too little. It was perfect for my wedding in January.
And that was the end…I haven’t colored my hair since. Oh wait, I did, recently, have toner added to the bottom half of my hair. Toner helped tone down my blonde highlights that I have been growing out and helps my natural grown out hair color blend more into the bottom half of my hair. Other than the toner, no salon color, no box color.
Why am I allowing my natural grey to grow out? Because I’m tired.
Tired of maintaining hair color every 4-6 weeks, and that’s if it’s a good coloring or me just being lazy, trying to stretch out my time. I promise you, I’d see grey two to three weeks after coloring.
I’m tired of the money spent. Ok, box color is anywhere from $4 to $20 depending on brand. Going to the salon…whoa, it’s an arm and a leg. I mean, really, who goes to the salon for just a single color process? No, we go, get the color, lowlights, highlights, bayalage or whatever the new trend is currently.
I’m tired of hair falling out and feeling like it’s straw. I’m not a scarecrow. The condition of my hair isn’t horrible, but I wouldn’t say it’s great, either.
Now I’ve been “treating” my hair, be it coloring, perms (thank you 80s and early 90s), chemically straightening (again, thanks 80s and early 90s), since I was in high school. So, yeah, that would be 20 plus years. My experiences have been lows and highs, but in the end, my hair is just burnt out.
The wonderful Almighty Husband has great grey hair.
He works mostly outside, and he’s exposed to the elements. All he does for his hair is wash daily and condition, maybe, once a week. That beautiful medium to dark brown hair has lightened naturally with the most perfect highlights.
Yes, women of the world, you would die for his hair, be it short or longer (sometimes he pulls off a surfer Jesus look), jealousy would be abundant. The worse part, he hates his gray hair. Did I mention the gray? No, not really, because it looks like the perfect low-light and highlight shades of blonde! Understand what I’m saying here? Perfect hair, not fair.
Here it was, a few days after the wedding, I proclaim “No more hair dye! Embrace the grey!”
Really, we’re married now, so he’s kinda stuck, right? The hubs thought it was funny, a joke. Tim gave me 3 months. Whatever.
Here I am, 11 months later, not one drop of dye.
Guess what? I don’t even think about it….much…ish. I admit in the beginning I would waive a little bit. However, it hit me a little harder around the time that my daughter had her 8th grade events at the end of the school year.
“I don’t wanna look old.”
“I’ll look like a grandmother.”
“Oh my God, I can’t look like a hot mess in front of my ex.”(Yeah, I let myself go there, when normally I don’t)
Constantly, I’d ask Carolina, because she’s a brutally honest teen, most of the time, how bad the grey look. Wouldn’t you know it, she’d say she couldn’t really see the grey or that they just look like highlights. Um, brutal honesty, where is it? Oh, wait, did I just get it?
Ding, ding! That’s when I stopped and said to myself, “Why do I care? Did I do this for myself or others? Aren’t you the one who wanted to accept the natural progression of aging? Weren’t you all, grey hair, don’t care?” (Yes, I did have a conversation with myself. Don’t you do that too?)
The answer: I did this for me. I don’t care what others think. This is about me and no one else.
For goodness sake, there’s girls out there paying to have grey hair. I’m naturally gifted with it.
Back to the Almighty Hubs…and the grey hair debate.
Tim made a comment that after we got married, I stopped coloring my hair, stopped going to the nail salon, and now that you have me locked down, and you don’t care anymore. Granted he said it all in fun, but it was all true. The timing was after the wedding, which was just coincidence, but the decision was made by me, for me.
All the primping was done because I wanted to because of how I felt, it was never because of what he thought and expected from me. I’m way past the years of primping for a guy. Primping should be for you, anyway, not to impress someone.
I understand that you want to be presentable and make good impressions. Especially, for work, interviews and important events, you want to present yourself professionally. Well, you can do that without hair color. Think about it, you’re not hiding yourself, you’re being authentic.
Also, you’re presenting yourself as a confident person. Confident? Yes, because society is constantly pushing the hair color and looking younger, but if you’re choosing not to color, you’re confident in yourself, and accepting aging gracefully.
I’ll admit that I’m starting manicures again. Quite frankly, a perfectly polished nail makes me feel like I have my crap together more than I really do. And that’s ok, because it’s for me.
I’m still going grey.
Hair, well, it’s still grey. It feels pretty amazing. I mean, literally, it feels amazing. Fingers don’t get stuck in coarse, straw hair. Now I feel soft, luxurious hair.
I’m not much of a stylist, never was, I just wash and go. Sometimes I blow dry my hair partially and if I’m feeling really put together, I’ll flat iron the ends. Still, my hair feels awesome.
Do I think about the grey now? Do I get self-conscious? No, not really. About every couple weeks I really look at it, inspect every aspect, and have a co-worker take some pictures just to get a better idea of how the grey is coming in. I’m not upset by the grey. I’m not thinking of coloring. It’s just more like a monthly inspection.
And I do have to make a proclamation every now and then to my family about still being grey. You know, to reassure the hubs that I am not caving and will continue to let my grey come in. He’s such a doubter sometimes. If anything, I’ll let it grow in, all the way, and keep it that way, til the day we die, just so I can say “I win.”